May Cause Seizures:

$10,000 + 25,000 lights + 2 Months of engineering = Cease and desist order from the Cincinnati Ohio's Sheriff's Dept.

Apparently this guy's Christmas light display was synched to music that was broadcast to car radios as they drove by. It caused an accident.

(watch this- you'll need sound) link

ID vs. FSM

For anyone not following the FSM / Intelligent Design debates with some time to kill before you sneak out of the office early, get caught up. It's getting pretty funny.

Flying Spaghetti Monsterism (FSM) is a satirical parody religion created in 2005 to protest the decision by the Kansas State Board of Education to require the teaching of intelligent design as an alternative to biological evolution. The FSM was first revealed to the world by Bobby Henderson, a graduate of Oregon State University with a degree in physics.

The parody religion has become an Internet phenomenon. Followers call themselves "Pastafarians"

In June 2005, Bobby Henderson submitted an open letter to the Kansas Board of Education in response to their scheduling a hearing debating whether to give intelligent design equal time with evolution by natural selection in biology classes. On his Web site, named venganza.org after the Spanish word for revenge, he formally requested that Flying Spaghetti Monsterism be given time in classrooms equal to that given to intelligent design and to "logical conjecture based on overwhelming observable evidence" (evolution). He warned that if this was not done, "we will be forced to proceed with legal action." Shortly afterwards, he received sympathetic responses from three members of the board; a fourth replied that "It is a serious offense to mock God."

Wired News interviewed him about the FSM Bible he is currently writing. Pirate ship? link

C&H Snowman Flickr Set

Amusing if you're bored enough. link

Save Me, Jebus

This sign is hanging over a coworker's desk. He's a religious dude and doesn't hide it. Normally I ignore the Jesus crap on his board but this one has me baffled. What does "No Jesus, No Christmas" mean? Is that like, "No Shoes, No Service."? Is it questioning whether or not there was a Jesus? Is it telling me i'm not allowed to celebrate Christmas if i'm not down with Jesus? If I remember correctly, Jesus wasn't even born on Christmas... I don't get it. All the time i've spent thinking about it could have been better spent building office supply battlebots or reading the Onion. Instead i sit and ponder the existence of Jesus and whether or not i'm allowed to laugh when Cousin Eddie follows up his Christmas greeting by announcing that his shitter is, in fact, full.

That sign is ruining Christmas.

un-undefeated

"Our guys wanted to go 16-0, and they certainly didn't want to lose at home, [The Chargers] just outplayed us today."

-Tony Dungy,
Head Coach of the
Indianapolis Colts

Take heart, Colts fans- there's always the Super Bowl.

VooDoo Xmas

Should you find yourself in a situation that requires Christmas music this year (and hopefully you don't), this meets all the sappy requirements while still maintaining some semblance of being cool. Enjoy.

Big Bad Voodoo Daddy
Everything You Want For Christmas
Link

Five rules of thumb

1. The stupider your ringtone, the longer it will take you to answer your phone.


2. The twin miracles of childbirth and pet ownership render you unable to share one photo of anything.


3. If your vanity license plate makes any reference to the make of your vehicle, the people you work with despise you.


4. Ph.D.s who ask to be called “Doctor” should be prepared to refer to every college graduate as “Bachelor.”


5. If you own more than one Enya record you might as well buy all of them and make a little fort.

From Merlin at 5ives

A Festivus for the Rest of Us

I'm particularly excited for Feats of Strength and the Airing of Grievances. Get your pole here

Paper Bag Lotto

When I was a kid, i loved McDonalds. I ate it every chance I had. Somewhere in my early college years I took a nutrition class and realized how bad fast food can be for you. I stopped eating it altogether. Recently my department has been hit with an influx of work and i've been forced to dash out of the office and dash back if i want to eat lunch.

As I was pulling out of the Burger King drive through into traffic today I discovered that they had, once again screwed me. Checking the contents of the bag and receipt I realized I had ordered a Whopper, paid for a Whopper Jr. and received a cheeseburger. The cheeseburgers at Burger King suck. Knowing that getting back to Burger King would require no less than 3 U-turns, I abandon any notion that returning to the scene of the crime was an option. As I passed a McDonalds, i noticed a sign in the window that advertised Big Macs for 99¢ on Mondays. This being a Monday and the driveway being right in front of me, I swung into the McD's drive through. The car in front of me was taking forever and I was starving. I'm sure I don't need to tell you what happened next.

It wasn't until I saw the horrified look on the drive-through employee's face that I realized I was about to order my Big Mac with a Burger King bag in my lap and half a cheeseburger stuffed in my mouth. I've had prouder moments, but not many.

update: Son of a BITCH! As soon as I published this entry I took a victorious swig of my drink only to be met with syrupy coke instead of the iced tea that I ordered! They went 0 for 2!! Damn you Burger King!! (shaking fist)