Back in Black

Los Angeles, CA – After announcing their break-up in 2003,
FACE TO FACE has revealed plans to reunite for upcoming live shows...link

thx Lisa

Xmas w/ Pee Pants

So we've been dogsitting a 4 month old boxer puppy for the last two weeks. I used to want a puppy. I no longer want a puppy.

As you can see by the pic, she's an adorable little dog and really is a sweetheart, but I believe that evolution had something to do with that. If she wasn't, she would be in puppy heaven by the hands of her babysitters a week ago. To say that she peed on the carpet a lot is laughable at this point. Our livingroom carpet is now a urine-soaked mess that i've taken to calling The Yellow River Valley. You might be thinking, “Well what did you expect, she's a puppy. You have to take her outside.”. Didn't matter. She converted water to urine at a rate that would make the guys at MIT consider using her as a new biological power source.

The pee and poo were enough to make you crazy, but the worst part was the psychological damage that took place. I couldn't concentrate on anything for more than a few minutes before I heard one of her “tells” and I would spring into action like a Navy Seal flying out of the shadows with a roll of paper towels in his mouth. For two weeks, any moment of relaxation was always under the threat of being shattered by either the discovery of canine waste on the floor or the cries of, “nooo noooo noooooo!”, while running through the house carrying a live doggie sprinkler. One of her favorite moves was to pause in the doorway on the way to one of a hundred daily walks and piss on the carpet with her head outside. She did it so often, I would pick her up in the kitchen, hold her like a football and run out the door like Walter f@#king Payton on his way into the endzone.

I would be remiss if I did not include mention of the Christmas Bathroom Massacre. Shredding hadn't been too big of a problem the morning of December 25^th. I needed to got to the store, but I couldn't take her with for fear of opening my car door on the way back and having a flood of piss flow out like when they pull a car out of a lake. I removed everything within puppy reach in the bathroom and figured, “What's the worst that could happen? She could poop on the floor or maybe find something i missed to shred.” Done and done. When I got home, I opened the bathroom door and was hit with a wall of hot shit funk that nearly took me down. Not only did she deposit the biggest pile of dook to date, but she shredded a fake banana plant and rolled around in all of it. Awesome. Merry Christmas.

She's leaving tonight. She will almost be missed.