An Open Letter to the Guy Who Wrote the Virus that Killed my Computer,

I hope your balls get caught in a large piece of machinery in front of several women that you are sexually interested in and they laugh and point as you scream for the sweet release of death which you're hoping comes in the form of a heart attack due to the massive amount of pain you're experiencing, but your heart is strong from the lack of overuse that comes with living in your parent's basement writing malicious software, so you continue to scream in agony while the women take cellphone videos of you and put them on youtube where everyone you've ever known sees them because ironically they go VIRAL.

Dick.