In a world where pixels aren't the only things that get... DEAD.

So there I was, staring at the back of the bank robber's legs. I quickly assessed the situation. In an instant I had a plan and without hesitation, I gyroed my legs around and landed on my feet. Before the robber had I chance to react, I delivered a powerful spin kick, connecting with his left temple and knocking him out cold. As his lifeless body dropped to the earth like a sack of potatoes, I scooped the hysterical pregnant woman from his arms and set her safely aside. This attracted the attention of the second robber who had been preoccupied with the teller. As he spun to face me, the sawed off shotgun he was holding wheeled around as well. Before he could squeeze a shot off, I managed to snatch a paper weight off the account manager's desk and hurled it, meeting him square between the eyes. His eyes rolled back and he dropped the shotgun, but did not go down. As I lept over the chairs in the waiting area like a hungry jungle cat, I could see he was regaining his composure. I imagine his vision came back into focus just in time to see the whites of my eyes as I sent us sailing over the bank counter. The robber grunted as we slammed into the floor of the teller's station. Before he could lift his arms to defend himself, I delivered 4 devastating elbows that left him motionless. The tellers gasped at the crack of his nose on the 3rd blow as stray twenty dollar bills floated to the floor. I made sure everyone was alright before attempting to call the police. When I flipped my phone open, I could see the screen had been shattered in the mayhem.

Long-story-short, I cracked the screen on my phone and cannot send or receive texts until i get it fixed. That part is true.

update 4/9: fixed.