It's "he-vä-ee", haole

5 questions for the people of Honolulu:

1. What's up with the chain smoking?

2. On a daily average, how many drunk, helmet-less girls kamikaze those rented scooters into payphones, and what kinda Jackie Chiles-team of lawyers do you employ to keep you in business? Waikiki looked like the speeder bike scene in Jedi.

3. Why are there homeless, miniature chickens in Hanauma Bay?

4. What mixture of oil and blistering sun will cause Too Tan Man to actually combust on the beach?

5. Where can I find an ABC store?

Hawaii was awesome. Snorkeled with crazy tropical fish and feared every other snorkeler thinking they were a hammerhead, cruised around the International Market and busted out the haggling skills (didn’t fare well- afraid of pushy Asian women), pool, drinks, checked out some of the O’Neill World Cup on the North Shore (saw a killer Andy Irons ride), pool, went to a Luau and ate too much pork, more beach, drinks and caught the last 10min of the Charger win (stupid time difference). And more beach.

Good times.

pics